Changes
by Horror Beloved
Summary: Changes... We all must face them, but this one's gone too far! When Nny meets up with Devi and a dead guy, all heck breaks loose! LAST CHAPTER UP!
1. A Girl?

Author's Note: Whee! My second Johnny fic, and no shit…. It's CrAzY! Okay, okay. So I had a little fun with the idea. The whole reason for writing, FUN!!! So, I hope you like it!  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
Johnny the Homicidal Maniac was dead. ...Or was he? Johnny (or Nny, as his friends call him) stood before the heads of the afterlife, God and Satan. They were concealed in the middle grounds of paradise and puddings of shit.  
  
"So, um... do I get to go to hell yet? Or heaven... wherever, somewhere I guess?" Nny asked. As long as he was dead, he thought he'd make the best of it and find his place as soon as possible.  
  
Senior Diablo, however, had a different idea. He stood bemused, thinking of how he could further push that little man over the edge. Every so often, a little fun was in order. More torment to those little ant-like people crawling over the earth in the mortal world. Trying not to smile too much, he came up with a completely bull shit explanation for a chaotic little plan. "Johnny C., as a waste lock, you still must be sent back. I can see that you are having some problems managing your physical self. Your anger seems to get you in trouble a bit too often. As I stand here, thinking of HOW to send you back, I think that a change in your life is necessary. Now, my idea is to leave your mind the same. Changing it would only change you as a person, and that wouldn't be good for your soul, now would it?"  
  
"Mmm-hmm..." Nny nodded, pretending to understand what Mr. Satan was leading to. "So... what kind of change?"  
  
"Oh, nothing much. Just something to... protect you..." Senior Diablo snickered. "Protect you from some of the physical abuse from your own kind!" He was lying about something. Hiding something as well. Even Nny could sense something wasn't right. But how do you argue with the Devil?  
  
"So... God? Is this part of the procedure?" Nny looked over to see that God was asleep again in the Lazy-E-God chair. "God…?"  
  
"Oh don't worry, there's no vacancy left in heaven right now anyway. Play along, and I guarantee that everything will be different..." He snickered sinisterly again. The fiend. "Oh, wipe that look off your face. When have I misled you? If you recall, I was the one who informed you of your status in the first place. Show some gratitude for your superiors." He smiled again. "Lookie, Nny. Time to leave again. Remember Johnny, you're worthless. Have fun with the rest of your life." Once Satan had finished talking, There was a great poof of smoke, and Nny was transported back to the mortal coil.  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
As Nny's eyes opened, the blur around him transformed into the world. His world, his house. 'Surprise surprise. I'm alive again. It's almost a shame that the so-called mysteries of life have been so damned redundant lately.' Standing up and brushing the dust from his knees, he thought to himself. 'I've been brought back for a reason. Time I took that into consideration and try to be a bit more careful with my life. I think I'll go kill some football players now!' He walked around a bit, pacing across the room. 'Something's strange. Different. Hmm...' He tapped his foot against the crackling wooden floor. He couldn't quite put his finger on it, but something WAS off. He wished he knew what. Shrugging it off, he decided it must just be the adjustments to being alive again. Regardless, he was thirsty. A nice walk to the 24/7 for a Cherry Freezy, and all would be swell. He didn't feel like hearing any more sound in his head, so he neglected to even touch the headphones. Sticking his hands in his front pockets, he left whistling to himself.  
  
For some reason, just walking down the road, he still felt funny. He simply didn't know why. Shuffling down the streets, he noticed that it was a strangely calm day. The weather stood still, and very few people were crowding the area. As he passed the Cafe le Prick, he noticed a few of the regular assholes were there staring at him. 'Ignore them. Pay them no mind. Time to stop the insanity!' he thought, keeping a swift pace.  
  
"Hey bitch! Don't ignore us!" One of them shouted.  
  
'Shit,' Johnny thought. He turned around a moment, thinking of how easy it would be to gut that bastard like a fish. Oh how kind, the words of strangers. He turned back around and kept going on his way. 'Bitch?! That's a new one. Screw them. Pay them no mind.'  
  
"Yo! Come here!" He shouted again.  
  
His Friend stood up. "Forget that one, dude! Little crack whore..."  
  
That was a first. Those names. God, people were such asses! 'Why must they use their intelligence to make my life miserable?!' He felt the fury rising to his throat. "WHY?!" He shouted at the top of his lungs, only to jump at the startling sound he heard. He clasped his hands over his mouth, ignoring the passer-bys that shot him funny looks. He was so sure he had just shouted! But that wasn't his voice. It couldn't be his voice! "What the-" He covered his mouth again. Was that really him?! Seeing a clothing store right in front of him, he burst into the door, running to the fitting room.  
  
"Can I help you..?" a sales person asked, as Johnny blazed by.  
  
"No!" he shouted, shuddering at what he heard. He shut his eyes tightly, as he opened the dressing room door. When positioned before the mirror, he gulped slightly, then opened them. "AAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!"  
  
The sales person rolled her eyes. "Weirdo."  
  
Nny stood there gaping, completely mesmerized by the image in the mirror. HE was a SHE! (Author's note: All further pronouns representing Johnny will be changed hence forth from 'he' to 'she.' *Snickers*) She couldn't possibly believe what she was seeing, but there it was, right in from of her. "Shit..." she spoke aloud. "That's some change..." She bolted from the dressing room and ran all the way home.  
  
"Have a nice day, miss!" The sales person chirped as Johnny ran by again.  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
She ran into her house, and slammed the door behind her. Descending the stairs of her many floor basement, she wondered why such a cruel joke was unraveling itself. She went into the dark, damp bathroom and flicked the light switch on. With a determined look on her face, she studied herself in the mirror. Not all that different, really. Her face was slightly rounder, and her jaw not as wide. Her lips seemed fuller, and her eye lashes a bit longer. Her course dark hair was at least ten times longer, flowing just over her shoulders. Her body was still just as skinny, but for a girl, she had a decent form. She looked down. 'My God!' Her eyes wide with curiosity, she peered down her shirt. 'I have boobies!' Starting to feel a little sick, she looked back up. Her fingers clenched against the counter. 'This can't be happening! I am not a woman! Well... I guess that explains the voice... and that weird feeling. And those assholes down at the cafe. Damn it! This can't be happening!' She stomped upstairs, angry as ever. Never in a million years had she felt so humiliated.  
  
* Who is that? ...Hello? *  
  
"Hey…! Burger thing! It's me!" Nny exclaimed.  
  
* You can hear me?! No… can't be! You're… you're… Tee hee heeeeee! Oh this is priceless! Oh lord, Nny, where do you keep the cameras? *  
  
"Shut… up… Just don't say a thing…! In case you haven't noticed, this hasn't been a very good day." She turned away from the little Bub's Burger Boy that represented the voice of his desires. As much of a pain as it usually was, Nny could tell it would be worse today. She needed to get out. After all, she never did make it to the 24/7, and all the freaking out was making her quite thirsty. Still with the change in her pockets, she left the house. With a sneer, she checked the inside of her coat to make sure that she had a few knives with her.  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
Nny stormed down the street, as mad as ever, with the fires of hell burning in her eyes.  
  
"Heya, baby! Where's a skinny little thing like you headed?"  
  
Nny spun around. It was that creep who had called her a crack whore! He smiled stupidly at her. That was it. That was all it took to push her over the edge. "You… You're talking to me?" The man nodded, and raised his beer bottle up in the air. He cackled a drunken laugh between his teeth. Nny smirked at him. There was something strangely amusing about this. She slowly reached into her coat. "You're talking to… me…?" Her smile grew wider. The man had a creepy horny look on his face. Nny decided this would be fun. As she revealed the blade from inside her jacket, the man's expression changed to one of complete and utter terror. He mumbled some expletives, and tried to run, stumbling around. Nny leapt at him, then pinned him against the wall, holding the tip of the knife to the man's throat. "I don't think I need to explain my day to you, but rather, teach your miserable mind a lesson…" Though she was not her normal self, her maniacal, toothy grin was still the same. "Not every is as submissive to your stupidity as you may think. With that said, buh-bye."  
  
"No… No! Stop it!" He shrieked like a sissy.  
  
She quickly sliced the edge of the blade through his throat, then casually stepped back as the body fell to the ground. 'That was somewhat fun. There's something nice about luring those assholes into their own idiocy. And it's a lot less bothersome than getting a beating before hand. But, now… how shall I deal with the assholes out there who are now my own gender? Heh heh… I'll work that out later.' She trudged down to the 24/7. 'Dammit. Stupid hair,' she thought. From running to the kill, her long brown hair had fallen in front of her eyes. She pushed it behind her ears, but could feel the knots in it. 'I'm not gonna get used to this, am I?' For a minute, she thought of chopping it off. But as she glared at the strangers along the side of the road, she changed her mind. The last thing she wanted was to get hassled for uneven hair.  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
Once she arrived back home, Brain Freezy in hand, she decided something had to be done about her hair. The wind had picked up, and dealing with it was quite a bitch. 'That's it! It's coming off now!' She whipped out her blade, and began hacking at it. Some of the portions fell to the ground, but most of it resisted, split and knotted. 'Shit… shit… SHIT!!!'  
  
* Nny, might I suggest a rubber band? *  
  
"Eh?" She turned around and faced Reverend Meat.  
  
* We're really at first base here, aren't we? *  
  
"Oh! Oh yeah," she replied to Meat's question. Pulling a rubber band out of a nearby drawer, she pulled her hair up into a high ponytail. Some of the side bangs still wouldn't fit, so she let them hang down, framing her face. "Hmm… better, but this is still quite fooked…"  
  
* Such is life, Nny. Such is life. *  
  
Nny raised an eyebrow at the whimsical little burger toy. "You can shut up now."  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
Author's Note: Okee Dokes. There's the first installment! Hope you enjoyed your stay, and don't forget to R/R on your way out! ^_^ 


	2. Adjustments?

Author's Note: Hi-deee Ho. I'm back. And I feel sick. No really, I do. Damn allergies. Okay, so if you like this section, I'll keep working on this little piece of- …Never mind. In all seriousness, thanks for the support. I'm having fun, despite my lack of the ability to smell. I think I'll go hack up some mucus now. Yum.  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
"I know what I'll do! I'll kill myself! Yes. Why didn't I see that before? If I'm dead, I'll have to meet with either him or God again. And then they can turn me back!" Nny exclaimed, laughing hysterically at the simplicity of it all.  
  
* I don't see why this strikes you as such a big change. It's not like you ever did act in a way that made it matter what gender you were. How, for you I mean, does it make a difference that you are a female organism? *  
  
"It's just not something I want to get used to. Besides, I'm not going to sit back and have the Devil laugh at me. I was not born this way, and I don't think I should have to live this way if I don't want to. It's not the change itself, but the idea behind it. I should clear things up while it's fresh," she replied calmly, reaching for a sharp fine knife. 'This shouldn't be so hard… I'm used to this now! Just die… I know where I'm going.' But the hard part was getting there. She sat down, knife in hand.  
  
(Author's Note: People, please understand. Suicide is baaaaaad. It hurts you and stuff. Please, think of the children.)  
  
She looked down at the vein in her wrist. 'Just do it! Then you can get your body back!' As often as Nny had thought about it in the passed, it never happened. She always beat around the bush somehow. Biting her lower lip, she brought her shaky hand holding the blade down on the other wrist. Slowly, she sawed to cut through it. She opened her eyes to see that there was not even a scratch there. "Huh?!" Holding up her wrist with more confidence, she slammed the blade into it for a mere spilt second, before it split in two. "What the hell?" Once again, not a scratch. And her favorite knife was in two pieces. "This is freakin' creepy!" Nny exclaimed as she attempted to poke the tip of the blade through her stomach. "I no die!"  
  
She raced downstairs and grabbed her gun in a moment of excitement. There was something strangely exciting about not being able to die. She pointed it straight in her ear and pulled the trigger. BLAM! The bullet bounced off the side of her head and clinked on the ground. "Now that's just freaking weird!"  
  
* Nny, I advise you to stop invoking harm on yourself. * Meat suggested.  
  
She ignored him. "That's odd that nothing I try to do seems to work, but there's got to be something that this-"  
  
* Nny? Are you listening to me? *  
  
"-body of mine. Maybe I just haven't been thinking hard enough, or big enough and-"  
  
* NNY!!! *  
  
"I got it! I'll swallow a grenade!"  
  
* You idiot… *  
  
"Hmm… Right, sticks of dynamite would be easier…"  
  
* You're insane, Johnny. *  
  
"EEEEEEEEEE HEEEE HEEE!!!! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!"  
  
* KABOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!! *  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
A few days have passed. Reverend Meat sat on a shelf waiting for Johnny to wake up. She had shut all the doors in Meat's path out of embarrassment. She had given up on suicide after nearly destroying the house. For the first time in a while, she decided to simply lie down and sleep. She probably hoped she would suddenly wake up with a dick or something. Not that it should have mattered. Nny never used it anyway. Meat couldn't help but notice that Nny was forcing herself to adjust to the changes, but Meat also knew that there would be more for her to deal with in the future. Suddenly, from the locked off room came a loud thumping and a shriek.  
  
"Oh… My… GOD!!! Why… is there BLOOD ON THE SHEETS?!"  
  
* Ah yes, I expect today will be another interesting one. Oooooh Nny, come out, come out! You can't stay in there forever! *  
  
After prolonged moments of silence, Nny emerged. "Um… Jeezus, I can't believe I'm asking this… what do I do now?"  
  
* One word, Nny. 'Tampons.' *  
  
"…Tampons?"  
  
* Yes. 'Tampons.' *  
  
There was another long moment of silence. Nny cocked her head. "Oookay. I don't like this. I really don't. Well, I'll be back. Got to get me those… things…"  
  
Meat waited, chuckling at the thought of Nny in a flowery dress with a pretty pink bow on it. That would be a sight to see. Only minutes later, Nny burst through the door with a box of LEAKS-A-LOT hidden under her coat. She stopped to shoot the giggling statue a death glare, then proceeded into the other room. Meat had listen to Nny shriek, groan, and whine for at least a full ten minutes before he could figure out how to use the damned things.  
  
"WHAT?! You put them WHERE?!!!" But, like every other crisis she had to face, she managed to overcome it. She slammed the door open.  
  
"So much for your stupid little game, huh Mr. Satan?! You thought you'd make me even crazier, didn't you?! I'll show you! I can live however you want me to!" Nny suddenly wondered if that was a bad thing to say. 'What next? Unicellular organisms? Jocks?!'  
  
She wanted to write in her Die-ary, but really didn't feel like having to explain to herself what had happened. Instead, she turned on the TV.  
  
"If you feel like you are another gender trapped in your own body, call this number to see if you qualify to be a guest on Oprah Windy!"  
  
"Screw that!" Nny yelled, clicking to the next channel.  
  
"I was a woman!" Shouted a really creepy looking fat guy.  
  
Turning off the TV, she decided books were more educational anyway. She took out her favorite book from the shelf, and read it as she left the house. One Hundred and Ten ways to Kill Someone with a Lollipop. She rounded the corner, when she accidentally bumped into someone. Falling back a bit, she looked up from her book at the tall figure that stood towering over her.  
  
"Watch it, you clumsy ditz!" He began walking away from her, then mumbling, "air-head girls these days."  
  
Nny looked down at the book, smiling maliciously again. If she was going to get used to these changes, people would just have to learn that name calling was rude. She crept up on the poor man and punched him in back of the head. As he wobbled, dazed, she pulled his hair, making him topple on his back, instantly knocked out cold. Once again, like magic, no one seemed to notice the killer drag her prey back up the hill.  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
The strange man opened his eyes, a bit groggy. He wasn't quite grasping the fact that he was chained to the wall with heavy metal shackles and nails planted through his feet. "Ugh… Where am I? Oh… OH MY GOOD LORD NO!" he wailed, looking down at his feet.  
  
"Sorry about that, but you won't be up there much longer." Nny stepped out of the shadows in the back of the room.  
  
"Sh-sh-shit! What am I doing here?!" He demanded to know, looking at the gaunt and strange looking girl who sauntered up next to him.  
  
"You weren't nice. I resent that. Okay, so it's going a little over board even for me, but I really could use someone to take my anger out upon. I have so much anger right now."  
  
"W-who are you?"  
  
"I am Johnny, but since you're the only one in here alive, you might as well call me Nny," she said with a smirk.  
  
"Your name is… Johnny?" He cocked an eyebrow.  
  
"Yes," Nny replied bluntly.  
  
"But you're a girl… Johnny's not much of a name for a girl…" he explained in a shaky voice.  
  
"Never thought of that. You're right." Johnny thought a moment about different people she had met and different girls she had encountered. "…How does Tess sound?"  
  
"Better, I guess, but…"  
  
"Yeah, um, thanks for making me aware of that little name issue, but I'm still going to kill you. Please don't make this anymore difficult." She reached from behind her back and revealed an axe. "Now, tell me, what makes you think that I, or all girls for that matter, are airheads?"  
  
"Listen, I'm sorry! I wasn't thinking, really!"  
  
"So what made you do it?"  
  
"Okay, okay. I had just gotten dumped by my girlfriend. You happy?! Jeezus, just go ahead and kill me now." He bowed his head. (Now that's a mood shift, ne?)  
  
"That still doesn't justify your actions. But, I guess killing you wouldn't do much for either of us…" She tapped her foot impatiently, thinking to herself.  
  
"So you'll let me go?" he asked hopefully with a genuine smile.  
  
"No."  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
Author's Note: Arg, sorry if this section sucks, but I haven't been in the best of moods. I really need to look at what the hell I'm writing. Oh well. Part Two's done. R/R. 


	3. Problems?

Author's Note: Wow, it's been a while. Sorry bout that. Oh, and just a note, this is the point in the fic where the plot starts to thicken. Despite the silliness, I don't want it to not have any significance, so here we go! Oh, and big BIG thanks to everyone who read and reviewed. *Wipes tear* you've made me smile! ^_^ ( See! Oh, and all characters belong to Jhonen Vasquez. Now… READ!  
  
PS Thanks to Saturn for some great potty humor! ^_^ (Apologies that I didn't have this here in the first place!!! *Sweat drop* )  
  
  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
Little Todd Casil pulled his tricycle out of the garage, ready to go on a nice and peaceful ride. His heart sunk a bit when he saw that the back wheel was bent beyond recognition. "Daddy must have run over it with the car again. I wish I could have a bike, but he works so hard for me, I know I can't right now."  
  
(From inside the house…) "God that kid's a pain. Honey, wanna drop Squee off at the orphanage and hit the casinos?"  
  
"I know I have to be strong." Todd tossed the tricycle back in it's place and sat on the pavement in front of his home. He looked next door to the creepy house where the scary neighbor man lived. Todd hated the sounds that came from that place. He knew something was terribly wrong with that man, but only hoped that he wouldn't be killed. Suddenly, to his utter dismay, the door swung open. "Squee!"  
  
Out stepped someone Squee didn't recognize. It was a strange scary looking lady. He wondered if it was one of his victims. …But by the looks of her, she could have been his family. That thought scared him. "Um… hello," he said softly and timidly.  
  
The girl looked up, and a wide creepy grin spread across her entire face. "Squeegee! How goes it?" She quickly jogged up to the nervous child and crouched down before him.  
  
"F-fine. Really."  
  
"That's good. I really haven't done much to keep in touch with you. To be honest, sometimes I worry bout you. So, gotten any video games yet?"  
  
Squee shook his head. "Nope."  
  
"Ah… okay. How sad."  
  
"So… um, do you know the scary neighbor man?" asked Squee, shyly.  
  
"Mmm hmm. We're… eh, close. Yeah, I guess you could say that."  
  
"Is he still scary…?" the boy asked solemnly.  
  
Nny looked a bit taken aback for a moment. 'Does he really think I'm that scary?' he thought. "Um… He's… Same old, same old really."  
  
"Okay."  
  
"So you think he's really that scary?" she asked.  
  
"Well, he hasn't hurt me yet, but he does really bad things to people… And the sounds… SQUEE!!!" he shrieked.  
  
"Listen, if it'll make ya feel better, next time I see him, I'll tell him to quiet down a bit. How's that?"  
  
Squee smiled with a look of relief on his face.  
  
Nny stood there, studying the boy for a moment. "Yeah, no problem. I guess I'll be on my way then. G'bye, and don't forget to stay away from the loose soil over there!" She called, as she ran down the road. Squee shuddered at the thought of what was under that soil.  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
Nny fondled the change in his pocket as she entered the 24/7 store. She glanced over the counter to make sure that asshole clerk wasn't working there. To her utter dismay, someone else she knew all too well was there, tapping her nails against the counter. "Devi!" She hissed, not loud enough to be heard. All those memories, those horrible memories rushed back. Their wonderful date, the happiness, the confusion… And then his mistake. He tried to kill her. Pretty dumb, huh? What type of a moron tries to kill their girl on the first date? I mean God! Oh-! Um, sorry. Back to the fic now…  
  
Devi looked over at the customer and blinked. 'That's odd… Why does that girl look so familiar?' She saw the surprised look on the girl's face, and wondered what was going on.  
  
"Um… hi!" Nny said with a wave. She wondered what Devi would do, when suddenly she remembered. Devi wouldn't recognize her as Johnny. "You're Devi, aren't you? I met you in the bookstore once." Johnny lied. (Well, sorta. They did meet in the bookstore…)  
  
"Oh! Okay…" Try as she might, Devi just couldn't remember. "So… who are you again?"  
  
"Jo- …Oh um, Tess. Um, just wondering, how come you're working here now? I mean, wasn't your other job nicer?"  
  
"Yes. Yes it was. But after I quit and tried to take some time to myself, things got a little… messy."  
  
Nny bit her lip. She knew which question she had to ask next. "So… Um, last time I saw you, you mentioned something about wanting to ask someone out… A Johnny? I think," Nny inquired. 'Hmm, that came out pretty natural.'  
  
Devi frowned. "I don't want to talk about it."  
  
Nny could feel herself go weak. "D-did you break up…?"  
  
"Breaking up would have been a blessing!" she exclaimed, angrier than Nny expected. "Please let's change the subject. I'd rather not think about him."  
  
"Oh. Okay."  
  
Suddenly, as if something twisted in Devi's mind, she blurted out, "That bastard! He was a creepin' loony! I hope he dies a horrible choking death, torn in the mud, ignited with fire, frozen solid, struck with lightening,"  
  
"Y-yeah. That's fine. I have to… I have to go somewhere now anyway…" With that, Nny quickly exited the store, and stood outside to the side, shaking with grief. 'That was a mistake…'  
  
From Inside the store:  
  
"Eaten alive, cooked on a spit, stabbed in the back, shot in the heart…" Devi continued to mutter. She couldn't help but wonder why the strange girl hadn't bought anything.  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
As soon as she opened the door to her home, a bright blinding flash filled Nny's eyes. "Fook! What the hell?!"  
  
* Just for some posterity, eh Nny? * Reverend Meat chuckled, holding the camera as he used to hold the burger. The picture popped out and exposed itself instantly.  
  
"Lovely. Thanks a lot." Nny grumbled, picking up the photo, crumpling it into a little ball, and swallowing it.  
  
* Not a good day? *  
  
"Not a good day." She replied. She leaned against the wall thinking to herself. "Maybe if I act as I used to act, and do all the things I used to do, I'll go back to being me again!"  
  
* Aren't you already you right now? You whine just the same. *  
  
"I mean the me that wasn't a girl. There are just too many catches to it. None of my friends- or rather, those who I want as my friends even know me anymore. And I still can't figure out how they piss right!!"  
  
Meat snickered at Nny.  
  
"No, I'm serious! Their urinals look like sinks, and it's impossible to aim right!"  
  
* You didn't piss in the sinks did you? *  
  
"So they WERE sinks! That explains the old woman who hit me with her purse." Nny blushed slightly. "I hate my life…"  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
Feeling a sudden surge of compassion, she decided to go down stairs and free the man she had hanging on her wall. He really wasn't that bad. Unfortunately, she found him now to be… dead. "Oh well. I think I'll go eat some tacos now."  
  
As Nny entered the TacoHell, she decided now would be a better time then any to get something to eat. Ever since the change, she had been feeling that pit in her stomach that might have been partially due to hunger. The desire to eat was the least of her problems. As she sat down in the booth with a greasy back of Lord-knows-what. She had just started digging in, when she was made aware of the greasy, tall, black haired, jock type sitting next to her for no apparent reason. "What do you want? I'm trying to eat."  
  
"Yeah, yeah, cool cool," he said in a mocking voice. He slid close up to her in the booth. "Just thought I'd like to be close to a cutie like you."  
  
"Either go away, or let me out please…" Nny grumbled, pushing him against the back of the seat, trying to get away from the wall.  
  
In turn, he shoved her back where she was. "Jeez, what's the matter with you?! I just came here to be friendly!"  
  
"Somehow, I don't believe you."  
  
He wrapped his arm around her, and draped it over her shoulder. "You can trust me, sweetie."  
  
"Stop it! Just get out of my way while your arm is still attached!" Nny's eyes widened as she felt the man's hand running up her leg. "I SAID STOP YOU SHIT!!!" She jumped onto the table of the booth, crouching in front of the asshole.  
  
The man turned around from Nny, looking towards a table swarming with asshole clones and drones and such. All of them looked like they were on drugs, with bruises under their eyes and doped up looks on their faces. "Hey guys! I told you this one was a weird little cunt!"  
  
One of the girls from that table started giggling stupidly, then the others chimed in. Nny calmly climbed from the table, and opened the door. "Yes. Yes. That's very funny. I think I'll leave you irritants to your laughter."  
  
They continued laughing, and at that point, everyone in the restaurant was staring at Nny. But as soon as she left, they went back to their business. None of them noticed Nny pulling something out of the trunk of her little grey car.  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
AN: So there you have it. A nice lovely cliffhanger to ponder over. Or not. Pleasant something. (Hee hee, I stole that line from Jhonen!) 


	4. Stalkers?

Author's Note: No, I haven't forgotten. I'll be wrapping this up soon. Enjoy while you have it! BTW: All characters belong to Jhonen.  
  
Special thanks to Saturn for inspiring me! Um… Yep.  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
The trunk of her car wide open, full of the wondrous devices of cruel and sadist intentions… Against those who deserved it of course! She pulled out two long thick chains, winding them around her arm. Her favorite orchestral piece, "Ode to Joy," popped into her head, and she began humming it gleefully. She took out her backpack and slung it over her shoulder. Lord knows what she had left in there from last time, but she was confident there'd be plenty for her to use. Slamming the trunk down, she crept around to the back door and wrapped the chain around the handles of the doors. They wouldn't be opening. With a curling grin, she casually strolled back around to the entranceway, the second chain behind her back. The people inside stared once again as the door flew open with a whoosh.  
  
"It's her again…!"  
  
"What the hell's she back here for?!"  
  
Johnny narrowed her eyes, sickened by the faces she saw. "Friends, enemies… Irritants! I hate turning back to the past, but sometimes I wonder just how many of you were put on this filthy planet for a purpose other than your own disgusting desires…"  
  
"Hey bitch! Shut up already!" one of the less patient assholes bellowed.  
  
Pacing heavily to his table, the sound of her boots echoing in the silence of the stunned customers, Johnny approached the man. She looked at him for a minute, trying to find something in that blank face of his. "You're a perfect example, aren't you…" she whispered in his face. After a long pause, she whipped a knife out of her coat, slicing though the skin on his face.  
  
"Gya! You bitch! You!" he shrieked, holding his hands over the bleeding wound.  
  
"Anyone else care to chime in? …No? Good. Now then, let's have some fun…"  
  
(AN: Hiya folks and faithful lap dogs! I just wanted to let you know that due to the PG-13 rating of this particular fanfic, I had to delete the scene of Nny's happy-go-lucky killing spree. But let me tell you, it was amazing! Something you would have loved! *Sigh* It had it all: Action, drama, angst, humor, gore, romance, strip dancing, mad monkey sex, people jumping out of cakes, and *Sees a Tickle Me Hellmo doll* ohh… that… Since I know you're the type of audience who delights in family fun as well as child protection, I'm confident you'll bear no anger towards the change. Go die now.)  
  
At this point, a measly five persons were scurrying around, clawing at doors and screaming, covered in entrails of the random strangers they were clinging too.  
  
"I think that's enough fun for now, so here's the finale, my dear, dear irritants." Nny pulled out a fully wired bomb from her backpack. With a few beeps, it was set for one minute. The people cried and continued pushing, attempting a futile escape. "Don't even bother. You're all dead in my eyes. I wouldn't let ANY of you good people leave this place…"  
  
"Please! Don't do this! Turn that shit off and let us out!" one of them begged. The girl from that table who looked drugged. She seemed plenty awake now.  
  
"No," Nny answered, with a maniacal smile.  
  
"God, you idiot! You'll blow yourself up too!"  
  
"Wanna bet?" Nny's grin grew even wider, if humanly possible. She tapped her fingures against her arm, growing impatient. Then, as the bomb beeped, ready to go off, she threw up her arms, howling with laughter. Then,  
  
KABOOM!  
  
Unfortunately for Nny, the fact that she was indestructible didn't even effect the force of the explosion. Her light weight body flew through the air and slammed directly into a car in the next parking lot.  
  
"Oww… head… pain…" With that, she passed out, slumped inside the cave- like dent her body had made in the car.  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
'Argh,' Nny groaned. 'What the hell happened?' It was cool, but not cold like at her shitty house. She sat, quickly realizing the couch she was on was not hers. 'Maybe it was all a dream… but where am I?' It was night, and it was dark. Nny rubbed her eyes hoping they would adjust. "Hello?" she said aloud. That was still the voice of a girl. 'So that part was real…' She stood up, scanning the room for movement. A shiny beam of light caught the corner of her eye as it flashed past her view. 'Metal?' She jerked slightly, afraid she might see a blade or some sort of flashy weapon. She focused in on it. 'A doorknob. Christ, that was dumb…' she reached to it and opened the door. Contemplating on whether she should call out again, she sauntered down the dimly lit hallway. Even if anyone was in the house, it would be hard to hear her feather light feet tiptoeing out. 'The door! Thank god!'  
  
"Heya babe!" A voice shouted as an ape like figure plunged in front of her.  
  
"Gyaaaah!" Nny shrieked, falling back against the wall across from the door. "Oh fook, you the shit out of me!"  
  
"Heh. Sorry babe." The man smelled drunk.  
  
"Who the hell are you? Where am I?!" she exclaimed. She pushed around the stranger and swung open the door. "Oh shit… I this isn't anywhere I've been before…" The streets were well lit, and around him were small unfamiliar shops and rest stops.  
  
"You're crashin' at my place. I rescued ya, afterall."  
  
"I didn't need rescuing, dumbass."  
  
"Dude, you were like sunk inside the OUTSIDE of my car… It wasn't pretty! I was kinda weirded out though… I mean, you weren't even spilling your guts out. You know, that food place, it like, blew up! It was one killer light show! I think that's how you got where you were?"  
  
"No shit sherlock. Thanks and all, but I think I'll be on my way."  
  
"Babe!" He exclaimed. "I saved your ass! You can't just leave! You owe me!"  
  
"Jeezus Christ! Get out of my way! I'm going home now!" She protectively reached into her coat to find that her knife was missing. 'Okay, so he was a little smart…' She shoved him to the side once more and made a mad dash out the door. She kept running, realizing that a strange feeling was building itself inside, a knot tied tight in her stomach. 'Fear? I'm afraid? Why? What the fuck is there to be scared of?' Tears uncontrollably flowed down her cheeks. 'Being used… After all this time… I'm still just a puppet of something. The wall, Satan… no difference for me, anyway. Just being manipulated again. God…' She stopped and wiped the tears from her face. It was so bright, this strange area. The darkness was fought off by what seemed to be endless lines of street lamps following every street. Nothing like what she was used to. Even in the busiest area of the city she lived near, the lights flickered, as if unsure of themselves. The allies were always dark, and there were always shadows to hide behind. Suddenly she heard the distinct pounding of feet behind her.  
  
"Hey babe! Wait up now!"  
  
"I meant what I said, leave me be!" and with that, she ran. 'Satan is behind this! No one is this much of an idiot! Shit, there must be a way to lose him!' As she continued down into the deepening city, the buildings grew around her. Behind her, the unmistakably dented car. 'He got his car that fast? And it still works?! Dammit!'  
  
(Meanwhile in hell)  
  
"Yes, turn to channel 66! Now I have one of the simulation humans chasing him!" Senior Diablo laughed into the phone as he told his slave demon about his comedic trickery. He then hung up and snickered. "Johnny C., you silly fool. You thought I'd allow you to adjust? You're my slave for the moment, and I will enjoy watching the further developments. MuaHaHaHa!"  
  
(Back in the mortal world)  
  
"Fuck! I'm pregnant!!!!"  
  
(Oops, wrong soul…. Ah ha! Here we go.)  
  
'Okay,' Nny thought. 'I'm being chased, but there are some perks to being invincible. I'll lose him….' Nny looked out to a towering Discomfort Inn. 'THERE!' She made a another mad dash, sprinting as the car flew past her like a gun shot. 'Phew… okay… Get in… Find elevator…!!!' Panting, she slammed her hand on the button. 'Open! Open now! God, if this keeps up, I should find a way to kill him.'  
  
"Miss, where are you going?!" a lady behind the counter called out to her.  
  
"Mind your own damned business!" she shouted back, scrambling inside as the creep stalker bumbled through the entrance like a train wreck. The elevator closed. Nny sighed. It would be simple from here. Go to the top floor, and attempt some roof hopping. Why not? She couldn't die, and that man couldn't be that much of a moron to follow. As she reached the top floor, the door slid open.  
  
"Hey babe! I'm a fast runner, ain't I?"  
  
"Shit! Get away from me, you bastard!" She shouted, poking the 'close door' button. Much to her dismay, He plunged in. 'No! Okay, just get out!' Too late. The doors closed. He smiled at her. She glared at him with pure malice before letting out a blood curdling scream and diving for the button. "Let me out! Let me out!" Suddenly, like a bolt sent from hell itself, the elevator dropped a floor, jolting as the rope tightened again. The lights flashed wildly. Nny opened her eyes. 'How'd I end up on the floor?' The man was sprawled out next to her, unconscious. She stood up with a jump. He was there! Right next to her! She tried to push the button. Nothing. Using all her strength, she tried to pry open the doors, but to know avail. 'Oh damn. Ohhhh damn. I'm stuck… In a broken elevator… That's about to crash… With a stalker from hell!!!' Nny let out another deep sigh. "Just my luck."  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * * * 


	5. It's Over?!

Author's Note: This is it! Yay! (Unless I decide to make an epilogue. I won't. I'm sick of doing this now) So, enjoy. Let's see how our Nny makes it. I thought about this chapter for months on end, the idea sticking to my brain like glue. With that stated, let me say, this turned out NOTHING like what I thought or even hoped. Oh well. This has been a shitty day, and I wrote this in twenty minutes without blinking. *Rubs her eyes mercilessly* Oh well. I think I captured demented crap and overall bizarre stuff pretty well. I can't feel too sorry for Nny, however. Afterall, his (Or her) diver's Ed. notes aren't LOST! Before I start rambling on how much I like Sonic the Hedgehog, I'll end this here. As I said before: Have fun! (No, wait... I said 'enjoy.' Oops) ...........*Falls over dead*  
  
************ *  
  
  
Nny sat down, scowling to herself. "Touch me, and you die. Talk to me, and you die. Breathe on me, and you die."  
  
"Yo babe, I don't see what yo problem is!" the persistent little man continued, taking a swig from a bottle of beer that appeared out of know where. "I mean, I'm doin' you a favor, skinny girl. Don't you wanna get laid-"  
  
"That's it!" Nny couldn't take the pure ignorance and venom coming from that asshole's mouth. Too stupid to realize the turmoil his kind produce. But... If this guy was immortal... "Shit. I don't care who or what the hell you are, but I'm gonna kill you!" Her frown turned to a smile. "I'm going to rip out your organs and enjoy it!" Cat-like, Nny pounced upon the man, knocking him over, and crouching on his chest. She ripped from the elevator a shard of razor sharp metal.  
  
************ *  
  
Devi had just finished a hard day at her temporary job. She returned to the hotel, hoping to get a good night's rest. "God... The art business is fucked up. That's all it is, business. I can do anything for myself, but it won't get me out of this hellhole..."  
  
"Gyaaaaa! Stop! The pain! AAAAAAAAAAHHHH!" screamed the inside of the elevator shaft.  
  
"Sweet angry jeezus, what the fuck is going on here?!" she decided to ignore it, and go back to her room. The shrieks continued, louder and louder as she ran upstairs. "This is too much! Did someone get stuck in the elevator again?" The screams stopped, suddenly, as Devi halted in front of the elevator entrance, and was about to press the button. Suddenly, a pair of hands pried the door open, and a strangely familiar girl hopped out, blood smeared all over her clothes, and the blade of metal in her mouth. "Oh my...!" Devi exclaimed in shock.  
  
"D-Devi?!" she stuttered.  
  
"You sick fuck! That's what this was about! You're him! You're HIM!!!" Devi shrieked.  
  
"It's not my fault! I-I-!!"  
  
"So what are those!" she pointed at Johnny's breasts. "You pathetic psycho. You did all this just to stalk me didn't you?! And stalk all those others?!"  
  
"You don't understand!" Johnny protested.  
  
"I understand fine that you are a sick freak! And you deserve to die more than that of the people you dissected!" Devi shoved Johnny against the wall. "I prayed I would never meet you again, but now that you're here, I think I'll do the world a favor!" she yelled in a cooky way as she stole Johnny's knife from inside her coat.  
  
"Um.... okay..." Johnny muttered with a shrug. Devi held the shard outstretched behind her.  
  
"This is for months of hating the world! This is for the time you stole! Die!" She shrieked, thrusting the blade at the girl in front of her. As Johnny demonstrated on himself, it bounced off her flesh. "Sweet angry... Is that a body suit?!" she exclaimed, ripping open Nny's shirt. ".....................Is that Victoria's secret?"  
  
"DO YOU MIND??!!" Johnny pushed her away, holding her shirt closed. He turned back to her for a second. "Listen, I've been having a few problems. I didn't come here to see you. And for the last time, I'm not going to kill you."  
  
"Hmph..." Devi muttered. "Why didn't you die?"  
  
"Because I have the curse of Satan...."  
  
"Okay... Bye!" Wanting to keep at least one shred of her sanity, Devi ran up the stares, hoping she wouldn't be followed.  
  
Soon, she was out of his sight. "Thanks for the help..." Nny muttered, slumping against the wall. Then, he heard a thumping coming from the elevator shaft.  
  
"Bitch! Ya took my organs!"  
  
"Ack!" Johnny jumped up a mile, and sprinted down the stairs. "He's from Satan, he's from Satan!"  
  
************ *  
  
From inside her room, Devi could hear Johnny run by screaming. Frustrated by her curiosity, she swung open the door. "Okay, what the fu-!!!" Devi nearly froze seeing the dead guy with a gaping hole in his stomach, complete with dragging intestines running by. She lunged back in and slammed the door. "It's official, I'm never leaving my room again...!"  
  
"Just give up already!" Johnny screamed as she lunged back at the dead guy, knocking him to the ground. "I don't care if your dead, I'm going to TRY and kill you anyway!" Using all of the longest blades she could find in the kitchen, she pinned him to the ground like a frog prepared for dissection. "Now, I'm leaving!" Taking a moment to breathe, she ran out the door. As she continued running, hoping she would find a familiar road, she muttered to herself spitefully. "I always hated when I would be chased by assholes, but this is dead asshole! Argh... Come on! Can't I get a little help?!"  
  
************ *  
  
"Muahahahahaaaa!" Senior Diablo laughed maliciously. "Now this is what I call good entertainment! But alas, I'm bored. Time to look for a new victim." Senior Diablo changed the channel on his favorite target. "I'll be back to check on you in a year or so, Mr. C." Senior Diablo then changed it to 777, and saw a cute little boy, sitting with his ragged teddy bear in the insane assylum. "Great, a new fresh mind to corrupt..."  
  
************ *  
  
Devi leapt up when she heard a knocking on her door.  
  
"Devi! It's me!" Tenna, her best friend shouted.  
  
"Oh shit, I'm getting paranoid again. Come in..." Devi muttered, wiping the sweat from her forehead.  
  
"Hey, how's all been?" the spunky girl asked squeaking her favorite skeleton squeak toy, Spooky.  
  
"I've been better I guess."  
  
"That's a bad sign, isn't it? Last time you said that, you went berserk and killed an evil dolly painting. Please tell me this isn't that!" Tenna pleaded.  
  
"No... but... Is it a bad sign when your former homicidal boyfriend comes back as a woman?"  
  
"Sex change is common in criminals."  
  
"And is invincible..."  
  
"Maybe you didn't try to kill him right...?"  
  
"And is being chased by a dead man whose organs are falling out of his body?"  
  
Tenna thought a moment. "Yeah, that's bad. Worse for him, I'd say."  
  
Devi narrowed her eyes. "Her."  
  
"Yeah, you're a really creep magnet. I wouldn't sweat it too much. Let's go to a movie!" suggested Tenna.  
  
"I don't think so. I'm not leaving," Devi argued.  
  
"Fine. Well, it's a movie I really like, so um... Don't go nuts and try to kill anyone with a croque mallet, okay?"  
  
"Yeah. Whatever." As Tenna left, and closed the door behind her, Devi was left in the darkness. She didn't have any reason to get up and turn the light on, so she laid back on the floor, and thought about gaping orifices in a dead man's stomach.  
  
************ *  
  
Johnny sat back in his house. Everything was calmer now, the problems were obvious. "I guess I'll be stuck like this forever. Oh well. Let's see. I'm a girl. I'm immortal. And of course, I have a rather conspicuous pet." Johnny looked over at the crazed rotting corpse he kept in an electrified cage.  
  
"C'mon babe, lemme out already? We can screw! Yow!" Sparks flew everywhere. Johnny was calmed by the smell of burning rot. He leaned back and smiled.  
  
"Maybe tomorrow will be better."  
  
*Are you sure?* Reverend Meat asked, with his saucy smile. *Things can't get worse than this!*  
  
"I know. I know."  
  
************ *  
  
Author's End Note: Well, that's it. Yep. No happy ending, hearts and flowers. Just a stinky, dead, immortal dude; if that made any sense. Well, that's what life gives us, right? Whatever. I think writing this has killed more braincells than the time I watched Entertainment Tonight for five minutes. May my soul find rest. 


End file.
